One woman’s story: living in a man’s world

Samunnat Nepal’s Chair, Kopila Basnet, reflects on the challenging world facing women who come to Samunnat

For three years the police and local District Office have been very relieved to have a place at Samunnat where they can send women and girls for short-term accommodation. We are not only providing accommodation… we are concerned about the problems of the women. It is so hard to understand the women and girls who are in vulnerable situations. It is like a delicate glass jar. We have to handle with care. A typical story is that of a teenage girl, Sabita*, who hardly remembers her father. Her mother had to go to the Middle East for work. She earned for the family but the money went to the wrong people so they couldn’t get enough food, shelter and education. When Sabita was aged seven years she was sent to another family as a maid.

Carrying a load: girls in Nepal often start domestic chores at a young age

Sabita grew up doing household duties given by the new family. She missed her childhood. She was very vulnerable in the house where she stayed. She also faced many physically vulnerable situations. After hearing her story, the police strongly recommended that Samunnat become involved. She had already tried to take her own life. Her suicide reasons are very common, like the love stories we watch in the movies. But it was not just one person, she had another boyfriend too. It is not a good sign for her future. Her education has stopped due to her lack of a birth certificate (Ed: this is a requirement to attend school). When I first heard her story it sounded like a simple young teenager story but I also realised all of the suffering within. It is a depression that comes from missing her childhood, parenting, family environment, and her dreams and hopes.

It is not only Sabita who carries the pain of being alone. At Samunnat we have several ladies who have suffered and were referred by the police. Some were sexually abused and two ladies got pregnant and now have a baby as well. They face issues of feeling aggression, depression and being alone. We had hoped that if we could provide basic requirements then they will start to overcome their difficult situations. But it was just a first-aid treatment. The very important thing I have realized is that we must have an environment where they feel part of a family, where they can get friends, parenting guidance, encouragement, love and support. 

Women live on the edges of power in a man’s world

Taking an oath of goverment. Published at https://theannapurnaexpress.com/news/the-woeful-presence-of-nepali-women-in-politics-and-government-1265

We had a dream to establish Samunnat Nepal to reduce violence towards women and help them become independent. The mission was to make women empowered and decrease dependency on men. The very basic foundation is the commitment of being independent with skills, and hardworking. But it is not easy to break the deep-rooted chain of patriarchy. Since 14 years, Samunnat’s mission towards hundreds of women has been to facilitate women’s rights, equity, and independence. But I have now realized that human nature is so complicated that we never know what makes for a happy life. Many women have stayed so long in Samunnat, and been independent, but they still want the support of men. I am not saying that women can only be independent without men. Our hope and desire is that women can learn how to live safe and productive lives in this man’s world, respecting themselves and being respected. This is a long and difficult journey.

*not her real name